So, you’re at university and you’re living harmoniously with fellow students…well, maybe not harmoniously. Quite often, students have to live with at least one housemate that has escaped the pits of hell, and landed in your house or flat. But hey, they’re all part of the experience.
To celebrate these annoying, frustrating and abysmal characters, we have listed our favourites below.
The joker, very much like the Batman villain, is full of tricks and capable of treachery at any given moment. Deceitful by nature, The Joker will aim to prank you several times throughout each day, making your whole university experience a living nightmare.
Common activities of The Joker include; taking pictures of you eating, videoing you in embarrassingly drunken states, and worst case scenario – posting the incriminating evidence online.
Social vampires, the Jokers prerogative is to publicly embarrass you in the hope of enhancing their own social standing. A truly despicable character… and usually hilarious (when they aren’t pranking you!)
Now we’re pretty sure you will, at some point in your university life, come across The Slug. A fascinating creature, who’s whole existence is solely focused on doing as little as possible, allowing fellow housemates to clean up its mess without any sign of guilt.
Common activities of The Slug include laying on the sofa and stuffing his/her face, whilst binge watching reality TV series. Very rare that the slug will academically succeed or excel.
Poor hygiene routines aren’t uncommon in slugs and they tend to smell quite badly – this usually annoys housemates, especially when inviting friends or partners back to the accommodation.
The Neat Freak
On the other end of the spectrum, The Neat Freak is the complete opposite to The Slug. Overly clean, the Neat Freak’s daily rituals include scrubbing the flat (ceiling to floor) and demanding other housemates tiptoe across the carpet or hoover up the 3 toast crumbs dropped on the kitchen worktop.
At the inconvenience of everybody else, the Neat Freak is an advocate of cleanliness, even at the most inappropriate times – walking through the door in a drunken slumber and/or being sick is likely to send them in to meltdown.
Taking solace in the orderly and polished, The Neat Freak can be an annoyance to any housemate… no more than the slug. If you’re unfortunate enough to have both the Slug and Neat Freak under one roof, expect a whirlwind of arguments daily. Basically… move out!
The Party Animal
Usually the life and soul of the party, the Party Animal is a charismatic and enticing creature to live with. Sometimes referred to as ‘the bad influence,’ the Party Animal has one ethos – never stop the party.
Usually a borderline alcoholic (not literally), the Party Animal will attend every social outing they can, never passing down a chance to get almightily wasted. They also love dragging you out to witness their socially awesome life, and at the odd chance you turn down their offer, they will roll in, middle of the night, and disturb your peaceful sleep with their noise.
Party Animals tend to be extremely likable characters; however, a word of warning – don’t be tempted to become the ‘social butterfly’ they claim to be – your main focus should be studying, not partying.
The Mood Killer
A complete contrast to The Party Animal, the Mood Killer is the one housemate that enjoys a tranquil and frankly boring existence, never to venture off campus or out of the perimeter of the accommodation.
On the rare chance, they are caught out and about, they can be identified by their stone faced, disinterested glare and monotone contribution to the conversation.
And if you plan to have any form of social get together at the flat or house, you can bet your bottom dollar they will be the first to oppose the plan. True to their name, Mood Killers aim to spoil the fun at any given chance.
Throughout Fresher’s Week the ‘invisible man’ myth will undoubtedly grace your ears – the story about the person who lives in the flat but doesn’t interact with fellow housemates. Always out or in their room, a glimpse of Mr(s) Incognito is rarer than a Big Foot sighting.
Usually fed through a slot in the door, the invisible person will not interact with any housemates and may leave you regularly puzzled, especially when you consider how they sneak in and out of the flat.
Absent or uninvolved in any housemate discussion, their ‘contribution’ can be both a good and bad thing. Our advice – try to interact with them and make them feel welcome and part of the house.
The intimate is a very different creature indeed. Usually newly courted, Intimate housemates are very much intoxicated by the aroma of love and can be found ‘snuggling’ their partner on the couch. Even when housemates eventually drag them out, their partner often ‘tags along’ for the night.
Common activities of The Intimate include talking about their partner… constantly, and missing out on any form of social activity with friends or housemates.
This can become an issue when his/her partner essentially lives in the flat, yet does not contribute to the payments or maintenance of the accommodation. Also, seeing the soppy, stomach wrenching snogs is enough to put anyone of their breakfast.